{"id":476,"date":"2026-06-09T13:14:23","date_gmt":"2026-06-09T11:14:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/streit-fair-austragen\/"},"modified":"2026-06-10T02:40:53","modified_gmt":"2026-06-10T00:40:53","slug":"streit-fair-austragen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/streit-fair-austragen\/","title":{"rendered":"Fighting fair"},"content":{"rendered":"<figure class=\"gc-hero\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/streit-fair-austragen-px-1024x682.jpg\" alt=\"A tranquil scene of a wooden bridge over a river surrounded by lush greenery in a forest.\" loading=\"eager\"><\/figure>\n<p style=\"font-size:1.18rem;line-height:1.75;color:#2E3A3A;\">Conflict belongs to every living relationship. It turns harmful through the manner: contempt, point-scoring, old stories. Fair conflict can be agreed, best beforehand, in calm times.<\/p><h2>The red line: contempt<\/h2><p>Criticising a thing is fine. Contempt , eye-rolling, mockery, &#8220;typical you&#8221; , works like poison, because it devalues the person. Whoever drops it has already taken the biggest step.<\/p><div style=\"background:#fff;border:1px solid #E3ECEA;border-left:4px solid #15807A;border-radius:10px;padding:20px 24px;margin:28px 0;\"><p style=\"font-family:'Cormorant Garamond',Georgia,serif;font-weight:600;font-size:1.3rem;margin:0 0 10px;color:#1E2A2B;\">Four rules for fair conflict<\/p><ul style=\"margin:0;padding-left:1.1em;line-height:1.7;color:#2E3A3A;\"><li><strong>Stay on the topic<\/strong> , one conflict at a time.<\/li><li><strong>I-messages<\/strong> instead of blame.<\/li><li><strong>Agree on a time-out:<\/strong> a pause when it escalates, calmly on later.<\/li><li><strong>Allow repair:<\/strong> a small step back (&#8220;Sorry, that was too sharp&#8221;) may come at any time.<\/li><\/ul><\/div><h2>After the conflict, repair is what counts<\/h2><p>No couple argues flawlessly. What matters is whether you find your way back to each other afterwards, an honest word, a gesture. Such attempts at repair hold relationships together.<\/p><h2>How to begin<\/h2><p>Agree on a time-out signal in a calm hour. Whoever uses it commits to resuming the talk later. More in the <a href=\"\/en\/beziehungen\/\">Exercises<\/a>.<\/p><p style=\"font-size:.86rem;color:#5E6A6A;border-top:1px solid #E3ECEA;padding-top:16px;margin-top:36px;\">General self-help impulses, no substitute for couples or psychotherapy. For lasting conflict or distress, a counselling centre or psychotherapy practice helps. Helpline (Germany): 0800 111 0 111.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How you argue matters more than whether you do. A few rules turn escalation into clarity.<\/p>","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_citadela_custom_class":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"citadela-post-location":[],"class_list":["post-476","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-beziehungen"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/476","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=476"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/476\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":688,"href":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/476\/revisions\/688"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=476"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=476"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=476"},{"taxonomy":"citadela-post-location","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gentlecoach.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/citadela-post-location?post=476"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}